
i feel like I'm never good enough for anyone.. no one is trying just to accept me for who i am.. they always neglect me at the end.. maybe that's why i push people away.. maybe that's why i don't want to deal with them.. maybe that's why i love myself's company more than anyone in this world.. I'm always outcast.. most of the time, i don't mind, but at times i really feel like i could use some company.. and the more the neglection increases, the more i become paranoiac.. and the cycle begins.. the more i become paranoiac, of course people will fly miles away :)
i wish i was better.. i wish i was someone else.. i wish i could inhale life and rebel my own.. i wish i had hopes and dreams that really come true.. i wish i had what it takes to be successful.. i wish i had the strength of facing all my fears and doubts.. i wish i had better people around me.. i wish i had true love.. i wish i had the determination to be patient and pursue what i want.. i wish i had the opportunity to do great things.. i wish people could understand me.. i wish i could fly away to a place where things aren't that tough.. i wish i had a real friend beside me.. i wish i could get a treatment.. i wish i could be more efficient and function like normal people do.. i wish i could change.. i wish i could find a better me, a happier me, a doubtless me, a funny me, a considerate me.. is it so much to ask??!!
.. N.O.H.A ..